Red Tent

Dear whoever,

I’m looking for a red tent. Would anybody be kind enough to lend me their red tent? I’m a woman in disguise, covered by a scarf, in need of a retreat. Where I can expand, lay loose, cry if I want to cry?

A stationary woman with open, unmoving eyes.


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In this photo taken Sunday, Sept. 27, 2009, a sculpture by Chinese artist Chen Wenling entitled

In this photo taken Sunday, Sept. 27, 2009, a sculpture by Chinese artist Chen Wenling entitled “What You See Might Not Be Real” is on display at a gallery in Beijing, China. The artwork is a critique of the global financial crisis with the bull representing the golden bull of wall street and the man pinned to the wall representing the jailed financier Bernard Madoff. (AP Photo/Ng Han Guan)

I just went on LinkedIn and it made me anxious. Facebook does the same thing, which is why I de-activated my account a few months ago. As I was scrolling down a page filled with some familiar faces of people I went to school and graduated with, old friends, new friends and random people, I read their titles of what they “do”. All the titles were impressive-looking. I started to think about whether or not I should change my title and what I would change it to. Professional Bull-Shitter came to mind above all else.


And then my anxiety disappeared.

When I was in Virginia at the end of May/ beginning of June I met some random guy at a gathering and he asked if I wanted to hang out with him before I left VA. I said sure, why not. We went bowling with my cousin and her boyfriend and it was OK. After I left, he sent me a text message and we shot a few back and forth. I asked him why he went into the military and he said because his life “was going downhill” and he needed to fix it. I asked him if he was happy now. He responded

“Yeah of course I’m happy. I have a good job, a nice car and a new house.”

Not very convincing.

I wonder if all those folks on LinkedIn are happy too. I hope their professional photographs and long, complicated-sounding job titles are doing it for ’em. Safe to say, it feels good to have left being a Professional BSer behind and welcoming twenties wanderlusting with open arms. No need to try and prove no fake happiness/success to anyone else. Or one’s self either. Or maybe they really are successful and loving their jobs.

Just love what you do, everyone. Be happy. Not fake.

❤ V

Ya never know who you’ll meet on the trail

Saturday, September 5th, 6:16 PM

Still hurr!

Haha yeah so today’s day 3. In bed earlier than yesterday. Geezum crowe. And I got my period today! Joy! Almost summitted Glastenbury w/ Steve, Dan, Charlie, Mateo, Alex and Sam. But ankle was throbbing so I cut out early. Camped at the base of the mountain, will summit tomorrow. And get water. Steve’s really nice. And funny. He, Charlie & Dan work together. Dan’s girlfriend has two kids: Mateo and Alex. The three men do IT work, testing hard drives and stuff. Steve deals w/ logistics. “If a server’s down in Thailand, I can fix that”. Along those lines. Steve had a blog about weight loss. He called it Continue reading

some twenty things for twenty somethings

“Quarter-life crisis”

That’s what I was Googling last night. Similar to the classic mid-lifer except instead of dealing with whether or not to fix my porsche or divorce my spouse, I’m dealing with things related to not knowing where I’ll be living in a few months, what job opportunity I should grasp, whether or not to attend grad school, and whether or not falling in love will fix all of my problems or create many more. Continue reading